talesofacurlyislandgirl

Just Think About It: How Valuable is Human Life?

Disturbing things have been happening in the world, as it seems to always have been, but it prompts me to write about the value of life. What is a life? What does this question mean to you? Life, whether through an animal, insect, or human being, is very valuable, and is very important. Most people (not the ones I know, for the people I surround myself with are compassionate and kind) do not empathize or even sympathize with others because ignorance is their bliss. If it’s not ignorance, than it is cruelty.

Personally, I can never understand how some people can view themselves to be superior to others … based solely on their skin color, their ethnic backgrounds, and the money they make. The world has been making this mistake for hundreds, if not thousands of years. Colonization. That’s a big one. For the larger countries, colonization had sparked and fueled the fire of racism and the belief that lighter skin tone is far superior. It has been ingrained into the many generations that followed and it’s still out there. The lives that are marginalized, how can someone even determine that their lives are worth less than others?

Upon asking for input from my friends about this topic, they added even more to the conversation. We discussed people with mental health issues. The value of life can be taken to mean something much less for those who are depressed and/or suicidal. Also, from an outsider point of view (those who do not suffer from mental health issues), “historically, people with mental illnesses weren’t considered fully human/alive” (qtd. from friend) and that is now different, a role reversal of a sort, if you will. Moreover, “now people with mental [illnesses] are applauded with the prerequisite that their illnesses are productive” (qtd. from friend). As time moves along the world begins to see life as something different. We also discussed how the quote “living every day as if it were your last day” is not entirely realistic, because people would become way too chaotic if we truly did live that way. If we use that as an excuse to do reckless things, don’t we endanger the life we so-called want to live? Also, why do we emphasize the lives of celebrities over everyone else’s? Media does not help, when all they report on are if a celebrity changed his/her hair or didn’t wear makeup while going out. The media has the power to “maximize or minimize lives” (qtd. from friend) and that creates perspectives for the masses that may not be conducive to the value of human life.

Now, people are still turning their cheeks to the horrible things happening outside of their bubble (where they undoubtedly feel safe and non-threatened). I look at these people and think, “but we are all the same.” How do people sleep at night knowing that there are terrified children right in our backyards? What about the families fleeing and seeking refuge from their own homes being ravaged by war?

I cannot fathom the hurt I feel when I meet people or see people on social media who seem to not care about the life of a person. Who made you this way? How can you not sympathize? Where is your humanity?

Human life is so extraordinary. Not one of us is the same. Even identical twins. They may look the same, but they are more than likely to share personality differences. Life is precious. Especially those of children, because they are still growing, and they are still learning. You can make a huge change in a child’s future with the thoughts and ideas you share with them (and let them share with you). Remember to have discussions like these with the people around you. Stimulate your mind! If you have children, stimulate their minds too!

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl

What are Feelings?

I am one of the most emotional people that I know. It has its pros and cons. I sympathize and sometimes, I am even able to empathize, with others, which makes me a more conscientious person: one who is willing to forgive and to love more than usual. But, it can also be a nuisance because I feel so much, anything can really make me cry, or make me upset. What even are feelings? Is it a good thing? or is it a bad thing? Would you rather be completely void of feeling or would you rather be full of feeling?

I guess it depends on the situation a person is in. Some have very complicated reasons as to why they do not wanna feel anything at all. I understand that, but if you really think about it, having that reason (or multiple) to not want to feel at all, is a feeling in and of itself. I think feelings make us human. Whether its anger, jealousy, sadness, confusion, etc; any feeling means that we are reacting to an event, no matter how big or small. I think feelings are important, they help us to reach farther within ourselves, past surfaces that others may just glimpse, and really express if we like something or not.

I am a very emotional person, but I donʻt regret it. I find my emotions to be one of the best parts of me. I can be angry when I need to be, and I can cry when I want to. I like to sympathize with my friends and family, and I especially like to share and exchange how I feel with others. With my many feelings, comes a very open side to me. I want others to know that being emotional is not bad, and it is not something to be ashamed of. I also want others to know that not showing any emotions is not bad either. Being emotional on the outside is a personal preference.

Are you emotional on the outside or the inside only? Who are the people you like to share your feelings with the most? Is it a person you share with? or perhaps is it the pages of a notebook?

I hope that however you experience feelings and emotions are always in a healthy way.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl.

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl

Change.

Alooooooha.

I am BACK!

I am officially a college graduate and a wife!!! I am also not in the islands right now. In the next month or so I will be back, but for now I am in the PNW (Pacific Northwest). It’s much too cold for this island girl, but I am enjoying the low humidity (my hair is pretty fantastic).

Graduation was amazing. I worked very hard for five years to get my Bachelors degree. Along the way there have been many hardships, but I have also made many connections and friendships (that I believe will last a lifetime). College is so much better than high school. In high school, I had friends. I still love these friends, but people change, and I only have two that have remained relatively close since then. Before I left Hawaiʻi, I had a conversation with the friends I made in college. We talked about how we hope we never forget each other, and I truly believe that I never will. The friends you make as an adult, may not change as much as the friends you made as a teenager and a child. Most of us have already gone through major changes and have transitioned into adult life, therefore, we should be pretty similar for the rest of our lives. Or at least I hope so. The ideals and insights we have made about ourselves and society at this age (albeit, we are still young) is something that I don’t see changing much in the future. I think that’s good. I think we are considerate, kind, loving, and caring individuals, and I hope that never changes. Mahalo nui loa to all the people who have contributed to my knowledge growth, my personal growth, and my social growth in these past 5 years. You are amazing people (you know who you are). I love you guys with all my pu’uwai (heart). Here are some pictures: In Hawaiʻi, we give lei at celebrations… Usually completely covering our entire head.

My wedding. My wedding was the most beautiful activity I have ever been a part of. It was small, oh, but it was perfection. I never imagined it to be that amazing. I felt so beautiful, and I felt so loved. I still do. Our parents (my husband and I) worked so hard and so quickly to send us off with love and many memories, and we are so equally grateful. We had a quick ceremony at the beach park that we met at almost 8 years ago. Then we had a reception that was so much fun. I do not regret anything about that day. The people who mattered were there (whether in spirit or in physical form) and that’s what made it perfect. My sister who is a growing photographer (not yet professional, but might as well be), took all the photos and they are so lovely. Check out her photography website here. My sister’s wonderful girlfriend did my hair! It was a rapunzel braid, complete with fresh flowers. It turned out exactly how I imagined it. She is also a talented at makeup, here is where you can find her YouTube channel. Thank you, thank you! My best friend drove me in her car, she remained a huge contributor to my bridal shower, my bachelorette party, and the wedding. She was so supportive and if I had bridesmaids, she would, hands down, have been my Maid of Honor. My mother. She suffered a stroke in early Fall of last year. Although her mobility in her left arm and leg is still currently very limited, she handled all the decorations and made everything as perfect as she could for her daughter.

So many family members and friends contributed to making my husband and I’s day so incredibly special. I could not thank them enough. You are beautiful people with beautiful souls.

Next time I blog, Iʻll go back into a normal-ish posting schedule. We are still going through moving process. I hope you enjoy my pictures, and Iʻll be back!

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl.

Time Moves Too Quickly…

Hello everyone.

Some of you may be disappointed in me, and some of you may be relieved that I’m back! I know it’s been almost a month, and for that I sincerely apologize. I have been struggling with school and my personal life. For those who have been following me since the beginning, knew that this year was going to be a huge deal for me. Tomorrow, I will take my last final of my undergraduate career and this Saturday, May 11, 2018, I will graduate with my B.A. in English with double minors in Anthropology and Gender & Women’s Studies (and high honors!). Another exciting thing happening this week … my fiancé is coming home! He will be home for my graduation and the following weekend, we will be husband and wife.

A couple of days after the wedding, a big new journey will begin for me. I’ll be moving away from home, so I will have many new experiences to share with you! I’m going to try my best to blog these next couple of weeks… but if I don’t make it, now you know why. I may just have to wait til after the wedding and all the craziness dies down to sit comfortably and come up with some words to describe it all for you!

Here’s a recap of what has been going on in the month I’ve been away from Tales of a Curly Island Girl:

I got another tattoo to commemorate my new step into marriage, by permanently placing my maiden name on my ribcage. It did not hurt at all, probably because it was so small and that I have already been tattooed nine other times. I immediately told my fiancé that I now felt “ready to be his wife.” LOL.

I did my graduation photoshoot … and another photoshoot (but that one is a secret). It was so much fun! My sister is an amateur photographer but she is very talented for someone who never uses photoshop. One day Iʻll give you a link to her website! She’s currently working on one.

I had a bridal and a “bachelorette” party on the same day! My family and best friend threw me a bridal party at a small tea room in my town. It was so cute! Everyone sat on the ground on small pillows. We played games and had teacup/mug exchanges, along with an incredible display of desserts and small sandwiches. I had an amazing time. That same evening I went out to my favorite bar to meet with my close friends and a few family members. We spent the night talking stories, drinking, and enjoying each other’s company and presence. I am incredibly grateful for all the love I have received from all the people who are special to me.

Last week, I was awarded money for a submission I made to Gender & Women’s Studies Contest: Research Paper. My submission was my final paper to my Senior Seminar for Gender & Women’s Studies, titled, Women as Birthing Professionals: American Doula Work. I loved doing the research on the amazing women who stand alongside doctors/midwives and expecting mothers.

Lastly, if you have been following along in national news (I’m hoping they are correct, some have been spewing incorrect information), you have heard that my island has been in turmoil since April 30th. We had a series of hundreds of earthquakes in a very short amount of time, leading to one of the craters (called Puʻu ʻŌʻō) on our active volcano, Kīlauea, to collapse and push the magma down the East Rift Zone. This rift zone runs along a main residential area called Leilani Estates. On May 4th, the Big Island had two large earthquakes, the second being measured at 6.9. Thatʻs the largest earthquake the state has had in about 40 years. That earthquake caused Halemaʻumaʻu (the crater at the summit of Kīlauea) to erupt ash, and it has been slowly emptying of magma since then (my concern is, where is all Halemaʻumaʻuʻs lava going?). That same day, the first fissures erupted into the residential neighborhood I just mentioned. I havenʻt checked how many new fissures and active eruptions there are… but from what I can remember, I believe there are 9 within Leilani Estates and over 30 homes have been destroyed.

Many people around the state and the nation are watching us right now. Some have had very unkind words to say. Here is what I have to say about that: Native Hawaiians have direct genealogical ties to the land. Those who live in Puna (the moku or district that the eruptions are happening in) know that when and if Kīlauea ever erupts, they will get out of the way, and they have. They know that what they have built on the land that is being covered was not going to be there forever. However, it is still hurtful to hear and see those who are being insensitive to their plight tell them that “they shouldnʻt have built there.” They respect the land, and they respect Tūtū Pele as she makes her way along cleaning house on her land, however, that doesn’t mean that they donʻt hurt watching their family homes burn to the ground, or the forests where they ran and played when they were keiki be destroyed. Be kind. Don’t be cruel. If you donʻt understand the special connection to ʻāina (land) that Native Hawaiians have, do not mock and criticize. Ask if you really want to know. If not, mind your business, donʻt be nīele (curious or inquisitive) if you really donʻt want to listen.

Okay, when I come back, if its in the next two weeks or after it, I will let you all know how my graduation and my wedding went. Then I will transition back into my normal blogging! I have so many ideas for my Just Think About It Series. I also want to update everyone on my Curly Girl Method Series as well.

Have a wonderful rest of the week.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl

Just Think About It: Living Life to the Fullest [A New Series!]

Aloha all!

I’m back and I have a new series for you…It’s going to be called: Just Think About It. A friend of mine found a list of philosophical questions and I’m going to dedicate this series to answering them (to the best of my ability). I want it to spark interest in your mind. I’m no philosopher, but I do pride myself in asking questions and actively searching for potential answers.

Here’s the question: What activities cause you to feel like you are living life to the fullest?

Let’s try to define what living life to the fullest even means. There are thousands of answers for this littered across the internet. Some say it’s the act of letting all inhibitions go in order to fully experience life. Some say it’s doing more than what we are just merely capable of.

When I think of “living life to the fullest,” I think of a wholesome life, one that makes me feel happy, one that makes me feel like I am making a difference, one that makes me feel like I am needed.

Activities that make me feel this way can be both small and large. Small things could be making a to-do list, and as the day goes by, slowly checking off each box. It could be shaving my legs after refusing to do so for a couple of months. It could be, finally, cleaning out my aromatherapy diffuser. The larger ones make me feel the best. Like, finishing that 15 page literature review. Washing all of my makeup brushes after a long three day event. Or, actively searching for a place to live when I get married and move out of my parents’ home.

I find joy in both small and large things. I think that’s what is generally able to keep me happy. Some people cannot find that sense of living through small, mundane things, which may make it seem to them that they are not doing anything worthwhile in their lives. An accomplishment, no matter how small, is still an accomplishment! I think people tend to forget about that.

For me, almost everything I do in a day makes me feel like I am living life to the fullest. Sometimes, even getting out of the bed in the morning does that too.

I hope that whatever you do, wherever you are at this point in time, brings you happiness, for others but also for yourself. Have a beautiful week!

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing out,

Curly Island Girl

Some Things You Should Know About Hawaiʻi…

Iʻm so sorry! Here I am, once again, two weeks late. Thank you to those who have subscribed to my blog (I see you, you have not gone unnoticed!).

This past week was Merrie Monarch Festival; a huge week-long celebration in my hometown of Hilo, to honor hula and the Mōʻī King David Kalākaua who helped perpetuate our language, culture, and arts. Our small city becomes bustling with tourists from the continental U.S., other countries, and family and friends from our neighboring islands. If you wanna learn more about it, or perhaps even attend the festival week, check out this website: http://www.merriemonarch.com. This week always makes me emotional, because we, as Hawaiians, are able to share our culture. Oh, and I feel extra proud to be Hawaiian.

The inspiration of last weekʻs festivities has led me to share some information about the beautiful lei of islands strung in the Pacific Ocean.

Hawaiian is most definitely not just a nationality. It is an ethnicity. A lot of people do not realize that just living here and being loyal to the place and land does not make you Hawaiian through ethnicity. We have bloodlines tracing back very far.
There are eight main islands. All are a part of the State of Hawaiʻi. However, two of the islands, Niʻihau and Kahoʻolawe are special cases.

Niʻihau is owned by the Robinson family and is constantly perpetuating both traditions and advancements. Because it is private land, you must be invited to come to the island, through a ferry from Kauaʻi. Niʻihau is the only island that communicates primarily through ʻŌlelo Hawaiʻi (Hawaiian Language), an older dialect than what is spoken today on the other islands.

Kahoʻolawe is the smallest of the main islands. No one lives on this island, because of its small size and lack of water. The U.S. military used it as an active training ground and for bombing exercises after World War II. After many decades of protest, it was given back to Hawaiʻi in 1996. It is now against the law to go to Kahoʻolawe, unless you sign up to volunteer for restorations on the island.

3. Hawaiʻi once had an Independence Day. November 28, 1843, was the day that France and Great Britain recognized the Republic of Hawaiʻi as sovereign. This day was called Lā Kūʻokoʻa. Many of our Mōʻī travelled and were educated abroad. Hawaiʻi was respected by many large nations.

4. Hawaiʻi was illegally overthrown by American businessmen and the U.S. military. On January 17, 1893, Queen Liliʻuokalani was overthrown by force, in which she conceded to avoid loss of life and in hope that what happened would be amended. After the overthrow of the Republic of Hawaiʻi, the islands were annexed to the United States (1898). In 1959, Hawaiʻi became the 50th state of the United States of America.

5. We have many different types of climates. Depending on the way you classify climates, you would get a different number every time. To keep it simple, I say, we have many! Hawaiʻi Island has 10 of the 14 climate zones in Koppen Climate Classification System. We get snow on Mauna Kea (which is the tallest mountain in the world measured from the ocean floor) in the winters and sometimes in the spring. Hilo is one of the wettest places in the world. Kawaihae is a very dry area. Puna holds our active flowing volcano, Kīlauea.

6. We are one of the most diverse places in the world. Our sugarcane plantation days brought many immigrants and indentured laborers. The main workers were Chinese, Japanese, Puerto Rican, Portuguese, and Filipino. Today, our population is very mixed, but we love it! All of our food and Hawaiian Creole English, or Pidgin, all come from the plantation days.

7. Most importantly, if you are visiting, please be respectful. Hawaiian culture, like many other eastern ones have a connection with spaces and all that encompass it (even rocks). If you are respectful, we see it. We appreciate those who visit and want to learn the actual culture. Whenever I travel anywhere, I make sure I also respect the area and the people as well.

I really want to write more, but the lack of sleep from this past week and weekend has made me sick! I get sick only once or twice a year… so Iʻll just take it and move on. Sorry for my word vomit. I just started blurbing whatever came to my head. Next time I want to start a new series! Iʻm still trying to pick a name… but stay tuned! Have a fabulous rest of the week.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl

Sharing Knowledge

This post was sparked from observing people. People in my community, people in my classes, and even my own family members have really motivated me to write this. It sort of begins with how we view ourselves. Hawaiʻi is filled with many ethnic groups; we call it a mixed plate. Why mixed plate and not melting pot? Well, mixed plates (local favorites) are made of different types of food, but all contribute to the deliciousness of that plate. A melting pot would be just that, melting down all the differences and it becoming one. Hawaiʻi prides herself in the acceptance of immigrant culture. In result of the sugar plantation days and immigrant labor, majority of the people living here are very mixed, hence our mixed identities.

Many of my friends and family, including myself, feel that we are not enough of one ethnic group to actually fit in. Often, I don’t feel Filipino enough, Portuguese enough, and Hawaiian enough. This comes with my parents being mixed as well and/or not passing down traditions or culture. A big problem in Hawaiʻi is the segregation between who is Hawaiian or [insert other ethnicity here] “enough.” I believe strongly in what makes you anything, is how you portray yourself, how you respect others, and how you honor the culture. Kanaka (people of Hawaiʻi) should not be pitted against each other because we do things differently.

I have seen time and time again of Hawaiians rolling their eyes at other Hawaiians because they don’t know enough about the culture or even considering them not Hawaiian “enough” because of blood quantum. Why? Should we not honor our differences and similarities? If the differences are bad, should we not educate them? Its not enough to say youʻre wrong. Educate them. Tell them why, and if its not a matter of education, take into account their perspective. This is what starts anger and provokes violence. We are all children of Hawaiʻi, we are all children of this culture.

In this way, I believe that all cultures, especially those who are marginalized must be respectful of one another. Everyone has a different story to tell. Everyone comes from different backgrounds that we should be respectful of. Because the belief that what makes you a stronger Hawaiian or African or Filipino etc., should come from how and what you practice is hurtful; it can even be hateful.

I may not know many traditional practices of Hawaiʻi, but I honor and respect my kūpuna (elders/ancestors) and the heritage that I have claimed through them. If I am curious or wrong, I do my research. If I am wrong, I would hope my friends and family correct me. I think what makes any place beautiful are the differences. Differences allow perspectives we would not view or take into account and helps us understand as a whole. We should be inclusive to all thoughts and cultures. I hope this sparks something in you as well. Do your research. If someone ever tells you that you aren’t enough of [insert ethnic group here], ask them why? Why do you say that? And if they say because you don’t know x and y about this or that, ask them to educate you.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl

CG Method: Part II

Aloha all!

Iʻm so sorry I wasn’t able to post last weekend — I participated/volunteered my time for Relay for Life Colleges Against Cancer and an Art Show. I’m back! I did not forget about Tales of a Curly Island Girl.

Today, I am going to continue sharing information on the CG method.

My first (and only) post of the curly girl method ended on this:

“This concludes your first steps of doing the CG method. Continue to take care of your hair. Next time I will discuss other factors and terms of the CG method (it’s kind of like black hole, you can get completely sucked in) like protein vs. moisture, co-washing, itchy-M’s, diffusing, refreshing, factors of humidity, using lube, etc. But for now, this is the best way to start.”

Protein vs. Moisture

Okay, I know you’re thinking, “reallllyyyy?” But knowing how much protein and how much moisture you have in your hair is super important. Curly hair, especially, should have a well-balanced amount of both protein and moisture. If your curls are lacking moisture it will be “limp,” and frizzier and drier than normal. Too much moisture means you are lacking structure and when you style it, it often cannot hold it’s curls. If your curls are lacking protein it will be stringy, rough, and break easily.

Too much protein means you are lacking elasticity. There are tests you can do to determine that: get a strand of your hair (preferably one that already shed), and pull at both ends of the strand. If it stretches and then breaks, you have too much moisture. If it just snaps, you have too much protein. A well maintained moisture to protein ratio means your hair will be soft, your curls will be well defined, and if you did the strand test, it would stretch but not break. Be very careful when assuming you need more protein. Hair that is given too much protein is very hard to bring back to a balanced ratio.

Check your CG friendly products to see if they have protein in them! You do not want your entire routine to be filled with protein or filled with no protein. Perhaps, your after shower styling has protein in it, or just your co-wash conditioner/shampoo has protein. You would have to figure out if your hair really loves more protein or more moisture through trial and error, but just be wary of the over treating of protein. Here are some common ingredients that are proteins:

Hydrolyzed wheat protein
Hydrolyzed keratin
Hydrolyzed silk protein
Hydrolyzed Oat Flour
Keratin
Variations of hydrolyzed collagen
Variations of hydrolyzed soy protein
Coconut (protein mimic)
Sea Kelp (protein mimic)

*protein mimics are just that, they mimic protein, if your hair is sensitive to protein and you keep running into that problem, check for any protein mimics in your products. If your hair has too much protein, deep treat with a moisturizing conditioner.

Co-Washing

I mentioned in the previous section about co-washing (conditioner). Co-washing actually stands for conditioner-washing, so that last bit was redundant. You cleanse your hair with your conditioner rather than shampoos. Although Curly Girls will use sulfate-free shampoos, some (such as myself) opt out of all use of shampoos. Most people would find this disgusting. I understand that. However, if you don’t quite understand how and why co-washing works, let me enlighten you.

When you use sulfate shampoos, you strip your hair’s natural oils while cleaning all the gunk out from the day, from your products, and from the air (dirt, etc.). When you follow sulfate shampooing with silicone conditioning … you seal the hair shaft from retaining any moisture you could potentially be putting back into your hair (that you just stripped the oil from). In order to get your silicones out of your hair, you would need sulfates to do that. Hence, the never-ending cycle of bad ingredients for your hair (especially curls!).

Co-washing is able to remove the gunk and dirt from your scalp and hair simply because you do not use any products with silicone in them. The catch is that you have to gently scrub your scalp with your fingers, or shampoo brush, for quite a long time, probably a minimum of 8 minutes. This action will remove all of the gunk and dirt accumulating on the scalp. Switching to co-washing is not easy because you are used to the “squeaky clean” feel that shampoos give you, also your scalp will have to get used to a lot of conditioner. After co-washing, rinse your hair out thoroughly, if you don’t, you only leave the dirt and gunk sitting there (that defeats the purpose). I use a light CG friendly conditioner to co-wash because it feels more like a shampoo and it’s easier to work with.

Some people don’t like this part of the CG method and it is not needed in order to be a curl girl. This is entirely up to personal preference, especially if your scalp and hair just don’t agree with this. Sometimes, I use a sulfate free shampoo because I feel that my hair is extra dirty or my hands are too tired to scrub for so long.

Itchy-M’s

My scalp is very sensitive. Even before I started the CG method, I needed to wash my hair every day (it was a huge pain) because it kept the itchiness away. I have removed the cause of itchiness from my routine, but I am still struggling with dry scalp/flakes. If your head is always very itchy, I would highly suggest removing the itchy-M’s from your routine. There are two ingredients (nicknamed, can you guess? Itchy-M’s) that cause itchiness. Methylchloroisothiazolinone/Methylisothiazolinone. If you have this problem, I would ditch any CG friendly products with these two ingredients. Some people have no reaction to this, and some do. There are products with no itchy M’s, don’t fret. Here a few that I use:

If it’s not the way you are cleansing your scalp (good co-washing or sulfate free shampooing), than odds are it’s the itchy-M’s.

Diffusing

Most curly girls who have just started the transitioning process are already spending an insane amount of money trying to find the right routine/products for their hair. If you have money to spare or you’ve been doing the method for some time and are ready to try something new, here it is. Diffusing. If you already own a blowdryer, perfect! If not, you’ll need to purchase one. Blowdryers normally come with diffuser attachments, but the ones they give with it, are not going to dry curly hair without creating an insane amount of frizz. You will need to buy a curly hair diffuser attachment separately. The one I have is the xtava Orchid (shown here).

There are tons of curly hair diffusers on the market, but I hear from the grapevine that the Orchid, and the Devacurl (this one looks like a hand!) ones are the best. I really love my Orchid because it’s huge and my hair is very long. Curly hair diffusers have various lengths of tips that allow air to flow out as it holds your curls and dries. This keeps your curls in place. When using a diffuser, use little to no heat, as heat is very damaging for our hair.

We all know that most times our hair takes hours and hours to dry (mine does), but if I have to leave the house for some reason, I will try to get my hair at least 50% dry with the diffuser. Disclaimer: it takes a very long time to use a diffuser (albeit, shorter than air drying but still long) and your arms will be very tired. My hair is so long and I have never actually gotten my entire head 100% dry using the diffuser because my arms get too tired. It’s a terribly great investment for those who tend to get sick from wet hair (if you wash your hair at nights) and for those who have short curly hair, your hair will diffuse much faster.

Refreshing

Okay, so you’ve washed your hair and you’ve went out and enjoyed your beautiful curls for the day/night. You’re home now, but you don’t wash your hair every day. Tomorrow, you need your curls to look just as good as wash day. This is called refreshing. Buy a spray bottle, fill it with just water or both water and your favorite conditioner. Spray your hair, especially those unruly curls that have started to really frizz and lose its shape. You’ll wanna saturate those curls for sure. You do not need to saturate your whole head, but some people do, especially if your hair gets tangled very easily (saturating it again and adding conditioner to detangle is entirely up to you).

After wetting your hair, reapply your products. How much you will need to reapply will depend on how well your applied and distributed your products on wash day. Some people can last 7-10 days without washing, and still have beautiful curls. Personally, I can only last every other day and I still have not found the best refreshing routine for myself. I have been working on it for a long time and I hope to hit a breakthrough soon.

Factors of Humidity

In case you haven’t noticed by my blog name … I live on an island. Which means, I live in tropical weather, therefore, very high humidity. Humidity can be a terrorizer to hair, especially the curlies! If you live in an area that has high humidity, it means your hair will most likely frizz more than normal. You will have to combat that. In high humidity, humectants in your products will pull moisture to your hair. If your hair has too much moisture and water from the air, your hair shaft will swell and cause frizz. If you live in an area with low humidity, it usually means your hair will be dry. The humectants in your products will move moisture in your hair out to the air.

Here are a list of humectants:

Diols and Triols
Propylene glycol
1,2,6 hexanetriol
Butylene Glycol
Dipropylene glycol
Hexylene Glycol
Glycerin
Triethylene glycol
Erythritol
Capryl glycol
Phytantriol
Hexanediol or -triol beeswax
Glycogen
Sugars and modified sugars
Sorbitol
Polyglyceryl sorbitol
Glucose
Fructose
Xylitol
Hydrolyzed proteins
Elastin, collagen, silk, keratin
Ethers

If your routine involves humectants, you may want to use less product in high humidity and more product in low humidity, to decrease the chances of frizzy and dry hair. I’m still working on this and doing research to figure out what is best for my own hair.

Using Lube

Yes, do a double-take if you like, I did say lube. Yes, I do mean personal lubricant. The ingredients for water-based lube are very similar to the ingredients in Curl Keeper. This is a product hack, and a much cheaper option at that. It’s light and it does not weigh the hair down and its totally CG-friendly. For those who want to try, make sure it is water-based and if you live in high humidity also choose glycerin free lube. It can be used like a gel, or as a refresh option for next day hair, or even to smooth the flyaways throughout the day.

There are a lot of curlies that actually carry lube around with them. It’s cheap (its not discreet) and its normally small enough to chuck in a purse or backpack.

This post is definitely part of my lengthy ones (I love it). Does this make up for my absence? I hope you look more into the CG method. There are so many new things I learn along the way and I do want to share it with you from time to time. I think I am going to start a series on the CG method. How does that sound?

Next time on the CG Method Series: clarifying, dry scalp/flakes, hair porosity, new products I’ve bought.

As always,

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing out,

Curly Island Girl

Idleness: Mental/Physical Prison

We’ve all been here, in a variety of time periods: weeks, months, and years. It hung over me during the first three and half years of my undergrad career and only recently have I come out of the stupor. I would define this idleness as “not going anywhere.” I felt that my life was moving but the end result was nowhere. I also felt that it was taking much too long. I had no clue what awaited me in an academic and career sense and I even felt my own personal growth was hindered; I still don’t know what career I am choosing to get into, the difference between then and now, is that I am okay with that.

It’s hard to give advice on something like this because I never know the situation that each person is in enough to fully “advise,” if you will. However, the only way I have pulled myself out of the feeling of being stagnant was joining in student activities and having conversations about my future with friends and family.

Talking about it is probably the most important step. It’s not enough to just plan it with yourself. The encouragement coming from the people in your life is much needed and critical in moving forward. You do not need to tell everyone your plans, in fact, sometimes it’s best that you don’t. However, tell someone, even if it’s only one person that you trust. Be open to their suggestions, and I would assume, they will be as open-minded as you are. Talk about your future and talk about all the possibilities. Do something that you will be happy doing, I’m sure you hear that all the time, but really, why would you want to be miserable for x amount of time? I do have one thing to say about that though, if the process to get to where you absolutely want to be is long, don’t automatically assume that you can’t possibly get there. Continue working towards that goal. If you have been reading my other blog posts, then you know that I am graduating this May, and you know it has taken me five years to complete this journey. I still have no idea what I am doing, but I respect my school and work ethic enough to know that I will end up somewhere great.

The second most important step to removing yourself from idleness is actually doing it. You have talked about your plan, you may not know every detail about it (things change), but you know what you want. Now, do it. Start small and move forward. Blogging was a New Year’s resolution for me (to begin one) and I’m still here! It helps me with my writing and with sharing my ideas, emotions, and advice on a larger scale. It’s gonna take time, it’s more than likely to not happen overnight, but it’s vital that you continue pushing towards that goal.

There is another side to this “conversation” that I do want to address. I wholeheartedly believe the people you are friends with, the people you hang out with, is going to influence the way you think. If your friends and even family continue to be stagnant and never doing something more with their lives then odds are, you won’t either. There is so much more in life than just doing the same old thing. Do at least one productive thing a day, even if it’s just going to wash up in the bathroom. If your friends and family cannot make more of themselves as human beings, as citizens, and as important members in your life then you have to remove yourself from them.

Reach for the best. Be the best person that you can be. I am not perfect and I sure don’t try to be, but I do want to leave something for future generations. I want to have done something worthwhile in this world. I hope you all push yourselves to be better and get out of the mental and physical trap that negativity and idleness holds us in.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing out,

Curly Island Girl

Self-Love: Stop Body-Shaming

Why do we shame our bodies? Why do we let our thoughts revolve around looking down on our bodies (which by the way, are so beautiful)? I had a conversation with a friend, last week, about the flaws that we have. We weren’t trying to one-up each other; this wasn’t that kind of conversation, but what we did do was go back and forth about what we hated about ourselves.

It made me sad, but I also realized that it’s important to talk about. We joke around about how society creates this impossible mold to fit. It’s not a taboo topic, we should talk about our bodies and we shouldn’t be ashamed. I get so hung up on the fact that the skin on my legs aren’t perfect, that my underarms are a little dark, that my teeth are crooked, that I’m hairy, that my butt isn’t big enough, and that my face is too oily, but I realize how important it is to love yourself. We are all going to fall short of our own expectations, but sometimes these expectations are impossible.

The thing is, is that society will always have a new norm of what “beautiful” means. Many decades ago, beauty was defined differently, and it will keep being redefined. But beauty should be everything. I wrote this a couple of years ago, in response to a picture I saw on social media, saying “Meat is for Men, Bones are for Dogs.” Here was my response and it still applies today. This is exactly how I feel about this. “First of all … STOP. Second of all … Why is it okay to bully the skinny ones too. Skinny, average, chubby, they’re all beautiful. So stop with the “men want more to hold on to.” A man will choose whatever he wants. Society is stupid.”

Who are we to judge each other? I know fat-shaming is a huge deal … but so is skinny-shaming. People forget that we all have flaws. I’ve met some of the most perfect looking people, who tell me that they do have flaws, it’s just that no one can see them. And that is also important to address. If we don’t talk about the flaws, then we expect everyone (including ourselves) to be absolutely flawless.

Over the past few years, I have been learning to love myself, and to love everyone else too. I think bodies are beautiful, no matter what shape or size. It’s a body! It’s functioning! How much more beautiful can that be?

Whoever you are out there reading this, you are beautiful and you are worth it (and yes, I do mean beautiful, men can be beautiful too). Talk about it, don’t be afraid. Odds are you’ll end up talking to someone who you thought was unblemished and flawless, but are really just human, and that is what makes that person even more beautiful. Does that even make sense? I think I’m kinda rambling right now, but what I mean is: Just talk about it. Look at yourself. Love yourself. Don’t be afraid because of what society says about your body. Be confident.

Happy Curl, Happy Girl

Signing off,

Curly Island Girl