We’ve all been here, in a variety of time periods: weeks, months, and years. It hung over me during the first three and half years of my undergrad career and only recently have I come out of the stupor. I would define this idleness as “not going anywhere.” I felt that my life was moving but the end result was nowhere. I also felt that it was taking much too long. I had no clue what awaited me in an academic and career sense and I even felt my own personal growth was hindered; I still don’t know what career I am choosing to get into, the difference between then and now, is that I am okay with that.
It’s hard to give advice on something like this because I never know the situation that each person is in enough to fully “advise,” if you will. However, the only way I have pulled myself out of the feeling of being stagnant was joining in student activities and having conversations about my future with friends and family.
Talking about it is probably the most important step. It’s not enough to just plan it with yourself. The encouragement coming from the people in your life is much needed and critical in moving forward. You do not need to tell everyone your plans, in fact, sometimes it’s best that you don’t. However, tell someone, even if it’s only one person that you trust. Be open to their suggestions, and I would assume, they will be as open-minded as you are. Talk about your future and talk about all the possibilities. Do something that you will be happy doing, I’m sure you hear that all the time, but really, why would you want to be miserable for x amount of time? I do have one thing to say about that though, if the process to get to where you absolutely want to be is long, don’t automatically assume that you can’t possibly get there. Continue working towards that goal. If you have been reading my other blog posts, then you know that I am graduating this May, and you know it has taken me five years to complete this journey. I still have no idea what I am doing, but I respect my school and work ethic enough to know that I will end up somewhere great.
The second most important step to removing yourself from idleness is actually doing it. You have talked about your plan, you may not know every detail about it (things change), but you know what you want. Now, do it. Start small and move forward. Blogging was a New Year’s resolution for me (to begin one) and I’m still here! It helps me with my writing and with sharing my ideas, emotions, and advice on a larger scale. It’s gonna take time, it’s more than likely to not happen overnight, but it’s vital that you continue pushing towards that goal.
There is another side to this “conversation” that I do want to address. I wholeheartedly believe the people you are friends with, the people you hang out with, is going to influence the way you think. If your friends and even family continue to be stagnant and never doing something more with their lives then odds are, you won’t either. There is so much more in life than just doing the same old thing. Do at least one productive thing a day, even if it’s just going to wash up in the bathroom. If your friends and family cannot make more of themselves as human beings, as citizens, and as important members in your life then you have to remove yourself from them.
Reach for the best. Be the best person that you can be. I am not perfect and I sure don’t try to be, but I do want to leave something for future generations. I want to have done something worthwhile in this world. I hope you all push yourselves to be better and get out of the mental and physical trap that negativity and idleness holds us in.
Happy Curl, Happy Girl
Curly Island Girl